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I made it to the gym at lunch on Monday which was... eh. The… - Then You Get Up And Have Breakfast [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Whole lotta labia.

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[Jan. 4th, 2006|09:58 am]
Whole lotta labia.
[how ya feelin'? |goodgood]


I made it to the gym at lunch on Monday which was... eh. The running was good and I felt like I did a good job of it but the leg weights were frustrating. Their hack squat machine is lower than I remember and the leg press machine was in use. Still, I got some squats in, some calf-raises, some weighted leg lifts (for ye olde glutes), and some hip abductors and adductors.

I did only one set because as I was getting up to move from the squeeze to the press-out I, as always because I'm a good gym monkey, took my towel and wiped the seat, back, and leg pads off until they were clean and dry. The chick who sat down after me took this huge wad of towels and sprayed them with enough cleaner to choke a goat, got this irritated look on her face, and then scrubbed at the seat and back like it was the only thing keeping the voices from talking to her. I know she was just being hygenic and all, and I know that sitting in someone else's sweat is just grody, but seriously.. the seat was clean and dry and I was STANDING RIGHT THERE!

So I got cranky and went and did calf raises. For those who've never seen them, I actually have great calves. They're one of only three or four parts of my body with which I am unabashedly pleased. So working them makes me feel better. Anyway. After that I did two sets of 12reps of crunches with a 10lb weight. And.. um.. yeah good idea that. I could feel the muscle fatigue at the 12th rep and then I felt the work yesterday so I think I'm going to stick with that rather than endless sets of reps or the damned 8-minute abs tape. Between that and wearing the weight-belt while I dance I'm making sure to keep my eye on both strength and stamina. My only problem now is working the obliques. I'm going to see what Krista has to say about it and go from there.

This morning was split cardio (20min. run, 10min. stairs) with a mostly satisfying but somewhat rushed arm, chest, and upper back workout in the middle. I missed the gym. I did the iso-lateral high pulldown with alternating arms again and could feel the difference in my right vs. my left side. I'm going to keep them seperated like that until I feel the right is up to the left. Same with the biceps, no barbell curl until the right stops fatiguing faster than the left. And for the tricep pulldowns. I did those one arm at a time too and found the same problem (of course I did) so the first set will be single handed with the second set on a two-handed rope.

OH! And y'all should be proud of me. I know I've kept my trainer frustration mostly quiet but the fact is that when I signed up with this gym I got a free trainer session. Mostly I knew it would be an "evaluation" and all but I signed up anyway. The chick kept rescheduling and rescheduling and rescheduling. Something like 6 times. Eventually we just stopped trying to reschedule it. When I joined the gym near my office I got three free sessions. I went to the guy and said "Look, I work out, nearly every day. I'm good at most of this, but I need some pointers on some back exercises." He said "No problem, include back exercises in your workout plan." And then proceeded to put me through a fucking fitness evaluation and explain to me how the various machines work.

I can't even tell you how much that irritated me. First, he's like "How much do you weigh?" Then he weighed me. I was right within a pound. Then he's all "How much bodyfat do you think you have?" and then did a caliper test. I was right to within 3 percentage points. Then he put me on a bike and set it for "Fit Test." Now here's the thing about those, they don't rate your speed or anything. They rate how consistent your heart rate is over the period of the 5 minute span that you're on there. The thought is that if your heart rate spikes then you're out of shape. The thing about me? I have a resting heart rate of 62bpm. That's really low. The top of my aerobic range (85% of 220 minus your age) is 161. That's a motherfucker of a big jump. So the machine says I'm unfit. Now, admittedly, if I were in better aerobic shape (or not pushing myself as hard) I could stay in the 140 to 150 range and if I were training for endurance I could stay in the 120 to 130 range but seriously, people. I'm many things, and I am still fat, but I'm not unfit.

Then, of course, this guy takes me through all the different machines, the ones I've graduated past and am now in freeweights, and completely ignores the back exercises. I didn't go back for my next visits. I just couldn't be bothered. Plus, I was completely pissed that when he asked what I wanted to weigh and I said it wasn't about that, it was about general fitness but that if I had to guess I'd pick X (where X is 30lbs less than I weigh now) and he looked at me like I was dumb and said "That's going to take a long time." I replied "I know, probably around 4 months." And he was rather insultingly surprised that I seemed ok with a regular normal rate of weight loss. I just wanted to slap him.

Anyway. So, this morning as I was getting out of the shower I saw Dani. Dani is the little bodybuilder chick trainer at my gym. She's this little powerhouse with a body like an olympic gymnast.. you know what I mean? And I said "Dani.. I was wondering.. if I wanted a session that was just for form pointers and to talk about technique would I have to go through the whole evaluation thing?" She said "Have you done your orientation session?" When I said I hadn't she said "Sure, we can just do that instead." I thanked her and said that there were just some things I wanted to try but didn't want to hurt myself and I trusted her. She was great and smiled and shook my hand with this nice firm "Hi, I've got a confident grip" grip and I've got a session with her next Saturday at 10am. I'm determined to get pointers for stiff-legged deadlifts, standard deadlifts, and squats. I'm happy about that and pretty proud of myself for being an extrovert. In a towel. While wet. Hi.

Food yesterday was atrocious. But today is going well and tomorrow is dinner with Cait which is always controllable. Friday night is dinner with Cait and mom and then Saturday I'm going to pack myself veggies and try to keep my fingers out of the food we're cooking. Wish me luck.


I had a fantastic New Year weekend. I won't go into it, I'll just say that the company was grand, the food was indulgent, and the movies were great. And should you get the chance to see Labyrinth on the big screen you should so totally go. But when he comes out in the white pants? Shield your face. That shit's not good for your eyes, people.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: insidian
2006-01-04 03:09 pm (UTC)
1. I hate hate HATE the "training sessions" at big gyms. We're not all there to punish our bodies; some of us LIKE the way we look and are just trying to FEEL better. I was also the victim of "So how much weight are you looking to lose?" guy. When I said I didn't care about losing weight, his next question was "So how much muscle you gonna pack on?" *strangles his thick neck*

2. But when he comes out in the white pants? DANCE BELT, DAVID! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, FIND A DANCE BELT!
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 03:18 pm (UTC)
Even at the little gym near the office (part of a 4 gym chain) it was bad! I just wanted to be like "PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! Show me how to do a stiff-legged deadlift and LEAVE ME ALONE!" I just.. I know that what he normally gets is self-loathing little women looking to "blast their buns" or "tighten that tummy!" but spend two seconds, find out what my goal is, and then believe me. For years I've been neglecting my lower back for fear of fucking it up and these people are not helping. I have hope for this new one, though.

And, fer serious Sid, you should have been there. Every time the package came on screen the audience full of freaks/geeks/goths/renfaire weenies would just giggle like four year olds and go "WOOO!" I loved it. :)
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[User Picture]From: wilfulcait
2006-01-04 03:14 pm (UTC)
Hey, are you already scheduled for tonight? Because tomorrow I'm filing this brief, and it could run late. Tonight not so much with the could run lateness. But I know your calendar is usually full.
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 03:19 pm (UTC)
I am, actually, but I'm also ok with the run-late thing. I'm due at Steve's tonight but I can wait as late as you need tomorrow or I could take the subway in and bring you takeout and we could do a quick dinner in your office. Or you could call me at 4 and say "I'll be here until 11" and I could remember that I get to see you Friday night and be ok with that too. :)
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[User Picture]From: wilfulcait
2006-01-04 03:21 pm (UTC)
OK, fine, be flexible. See if I care.

Tell you what, how about at 4 tomorrow I call you and we figure out a plan.
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 04:43 pm (UTC)
My flexibility thwarts you!

I'll talk to you then if not before. I told Mom we'd be there for Saturday breakfast and that was the only for-sure meal so if we're going to be leaving early enough on Friday we'll just grab take-out or something fast and eat at her place. That way we can be flexible and she's not having to keep things under heatlamps. :)
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[User Picture]From: ipso__facto
2006-01-04 03:23 pm (UTC)
Dude. If things don't work out with your trainer there? Let me know. We have 3 here, and although scheduling with them can be a bitch as they all have full time jobs outside of this gym, at least 2 of them are good enough that they'd listen to you and help you out. I'd have to talk to them about skipping the evaluation, but it's possible that I could call in a favor or two. Anyway, keep that in mind. :)

That shit's not good for your eyes, people.
Not good for Hoggle's eyes, either. Dude, watch that.
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 04:44 pm (UTC)
That'd be great! I mean I know there are things I'm doing wrong with some other exercises, but I'm fixing them bit by bit.. but I have no intention of starting the back stuff without a trainer to help. That shit'll hurt you. I like my back too much.


Dude, you have no power over me.
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[User Picture]From: maitheas
2006-01-04 03:34 pm (UTC)
First, what I'm doing for my abs and obliques: I bought a Big Hula Hoop. No really. It weighs 10lbs, and as soon as I practice enough to keep it going for more than 15 seconds at a go, I'm sure it will help with those pesky weak abs of mine. *practices lots*

Second: I now have to watch Labyrinth again. Also? This makes my comment to Lala earlier this morning funny as all hell, which was not the intention of it, but maybe that's a good thing, too.

Hi.
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 04:46 pm (UTC)
I'm liking the one or two sets of weighted crunches. I don't feel like I'm spending all day. And having the weighted belt on while I dance means I'm getting subtler movements worked as well. I was just so tired of doing 150 crunches and being tired and feeling like I'd wasted my workout time. blech.

Dude, seeing Labyrinth on the big screen was way cool. But I bet the mother of the two little kids in front of us wasn't pleased that we kept making lewd comments at Ye Olde Bowie Package.
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From: starfishchick
2006-01-04 03:35 pm (UTC)


Who else is love?
pseudomonas me scripsit anno 2005
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[User Picture]From: dawntreader90
2006-01-04 04:21 pm (UTC)
heh, sounds like you have the same fit vs. unfit dilemma i have. i have a super-low resting heart rate that always charts on the "super-athletic" category, but my aerobic heartrate is around 160 just like yours.

he looked at me like I was dumb and said "That's going to take a long time."

i don't know how you didn't keep from glaring at him. i'd have said something snippy like, "i think i'm well aware of that, DUDE. or i wouldn't be here!"

gr. nothing like a little new year's motivation to start the routine off right! ah well, you don't need that guy. you are creating your own motivation!!
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 04:49 pm (UTC)
Exactly that problem. My doctors are always like "Your heart rate is really low.. do you work out?" They get all worried, it's cute. But it means I fail every fitness test based on heart rate. Now once I ramp up I stay within 10bpm for the remainder of the workout but seriously.. people piss me off.

As for not glaring at him, I wasn't that good. I gave him this look like "I didn't fall off the turnip truck yesterday" and said "Yes, I'm aware." I wanted to show him my before pictures and discuss pounds and inches lost and tell him that if anyone knows how long it takes to lose weight it's me and he should just... ARG! Anyway. He still sees me in there but I don't even have the time to blow him off. I'm busy being unfit. :)

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[User Picture]From: dawntreader90
2006-01-04 06:04 pm (UTC)
the lady says disdainfully, "I don't even have TIME to blow you off."

ooo. that's a good one i will have to use to my advantage someday!
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[User Picture]From: protoainsley
2006-01-05 02:41 am (UTC)
Should I be paying attention to my heart rate when I exercise? Why?
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-05 09:45 pm (UTC)
Um. Yes. Yes you should. Because, among other things, the little fit test is right, those more fit really do change their heart rate less over the course of an exercise. They just shouldn't start testing from the cold-start minute. And they should check your resting rate first..

The long and short is that as your aerobic fitness increases then your body becomes more efficient. Your heartrate slows, both at rest and a play as your heart muscle is getting stronger and not having to work as hard to pump blood. The more adept you become at a certain exercise (at a certain level) the less your heart rate will increase. For those out of shape, the heart rate increases just standing up and walking to the bathroom, for the moderately fit this isn't an issue. Likewise, for the moderately fit the heart rate increases when running at a sprint while for a sprinter it doesn't increase as much. It's all relative.

So, keeping an eye on your heart rate leads, at first, to knowing when you're overstressing your body. You should aim to never go more than 80% of max heart rate (mhr is 220 minus your age).. though I sometimes do. But keep it in the 60% to 80% of MHR to ensure that you're getting a good but maintainable workout. When the Department of Health says get 30min a day of aerobic exercise they mean spend 30 minutes a day with your heart rate in your 60-80 zone.

Later, after you start getting all buff (and by you I mean the generic exerciser, not you in particular), it will tell you when it's time to up your level, increase your distance, or maybe add some more resistance to what you're doing. The better you get at something, the less work your body is doing.. keeping it between 60 and 80% of MHR keeps you stretching for better aerobic fitness. Your heart rate and your rate of perceived exertion are as good a gauge of your fitness as your weight and body fat ratio are.

By the by, lifting weights will keep your heart rate accelerated just like working out on machines, and if instead of resting between sets you do alternating body part sets with no rest (i.e. instead of doing a set of benchpresses and then waiting and doing another set you do a set of bench, go immediately to a set of calf raises [or something else that doesn't work the bench muscles] and then back for your second set of bench) you keep that heart rate accelerated to a level comparable to a moderate run or a moderate elliptical session.

When working out on a machine you'll generally have the benefit of handheld heart rate sensors but when working out with weights you'll have to take it yourself. Count it for 6 seconds, multiply by 10.

And also? Jesus, I talk WAY too much.
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 04:51 pm (UTC)
And also? How cute is your Snoopy with the weights!? I need a weights icon. :)
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[User Picture]From: dawntreader90
2006-01-04 06:06 pm (UTC)
i also have a snoopy yoga. :)
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[User Picture]From: dawntreader90
2006-01-04 04:22 pm (UTC)
oops. didn't mean to reply to this comment. i thought i was replying to the original entry.
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 04:46 pm (UTC)
N'aww! And look at Katchoo right there in the middle with her gun. And Toby's little irritated face. Hee!
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From: starfishchick
2006-01-04 04:49 pm (UTC)
Katchoo totally makes me think of you.

And Toby, hating everyone, and JACK, having to pee!
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 04:51 pm (UTC)
I went back to him for my default because I missed his wee little unhappy face. :)
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[User Picture]From: rcdl
2006-01-04 05:05 pm (UTC)
rofl... JC, Corbett and I were just talking about David Bowie's "massive" performance in that movie the other day.

Why do all the fugly guys get the big cackinballs? :(
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-04 05:13 pm (UTC)
Seriously, Ricky, it was so cool seeing it on the big screen surrounded by every high-school outcast in the tri-state area. Of course they're all now rich geeks enjoying their revenge. But hearing them giggle like little kids? That was fun. Loved it.

How was your birthday?
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[User Picture]From: kfitzwarin
2006-01-04 05:56 pm (UTC)
I will try to have some decent snacks in the kitchen.
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[User Picture]From: cindyjade
2006-01-04 06:27 pm (UTC)
mellies.
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[User Picture]From: mellyflori
2006-01-05 09:31 pm (UTC)
You. Hello, you. I have your cowtails hostage. I shall be bringing them back when next you present yourself for hugses.
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